SassTown

The long and winding road trip has us hanging in the sleepy hollow known as Beaverdam Gap just below the Blue Ridge Parkway. It's hot. Very, very hot. My Aunt says we are having a dog day summer. Life moves slow here, there's no internet at the house, so this Yankee has made friends at the closest coffee shop.

The thought of sitting next to 3 or 4 deputies every morning of my visit intrigued me. I was anticipating overhearing some really juicy crime investigation details. So far I've been disappointed and bored. It's just as well because I need to plow through planning out the last leg of our trip and manage all the minions in my life from afar.

Up Beaverdam

Hummingbirds antics occupy a lot of my time these days, they seem to love my dad's simple back porch. It's not unusual to have 7 of them buzzing around taking turns on the feeder. Walking up the creek, target practice with the bb gun, reading and picking flees off of the dog have my girls occupied much of the time.

Yesterday, we were all fed up with the unrelenting heat and lack of air conditioning so we did what any respectable mother daughter trio would do and made our way down the mountain to the nail salon for pedicures. It was an hour of bliss watching Judge Judy in the cool of the salon, having our bug bitten legs lotioned and rubbed. I caught up with the girls eating french fries at the diner next to the salon, who were not in the mood for my picture antics when I wanted a memoir of their purple and blue selections.

Today, we are going to drive up on the parkway in search of bears and hit the Arboretum. Then I'm getting a lesson canning green beans. Dinner today will be compliments of 12 Bones in Asheville because it's too darn hot to cook again.

Tomorrow begins our last leg of the long and winding road trip to our new home in Austin, Tx. We are stopping in Memphis and then continuing on through Little Rock, Dallas and through to get a look see at our new house near the eastern edge of Lake Travis. Mercy!

We are officially moved out and the van arrived at our new home yesterday with my husband and his sister in charge of the "move in" process. It has been a task that has totally encompassed pretty much every waking moment for the past couple months for me. It's also a milestone for our family because in all of our years and moves it is the first time Raymondo has actually been present, let alone in charge of getting all of our stuff moved in.

Now, accompanied by my two youngest birds, we are taking The Long & Winding Road Trip to the new phase in our lives. The adventure of relocating from Michigan to Austin, Texas is officially underway.

Lake Erie

Beach days

My good old Ford Flex is packed in a fashion that would do a German engineer proud. We hit the road out of Michigan last Monday and arrived at our first stop at our cousin's house on Lake Erie and have been enjoying beach side living for the last few days. It only took us a few hours to arrive here, so it was just a very baby step in our journey.

My Aunt sharing garden lessons with the neighbor

Bounty from David's garden

We have shared a couple of days of bounty from the nearby gardens, fresh flowers mysteriously arriving on the porch each morning before we get up, sand, surf, games, camp fires, great food & wine. Traveling is lovely when your visiting salt of the earth people who can cook like nobody's business.

As hard as it is going to be to leave here, we need to finish our blueberry pancakes and hit the road. Today is a big travel day through Columbus, Cincinnati, Kentucky, Tennessee and on to the good old Smoky Mountains of North Carolina where my mountain goat of a Daddy lives.

My baby has a baby

My biggest challenge in the next hour before we hit the open road is making sure we don't have a stow away on board named Olive. When you have a 125 pound beast for a family dog, little Olive may be far too big of a temptation for my baby to bare. I can't have my cousin chasing after us trying to retrieve her little darling, can I ?

Thanks to the hostess with the mostest

 Long time, no see. The process of moving has totally overtaken my life, energy and intellectual capital. I'm barely keeping my head above water in the sea of overwhelm. I have this plan in my mind where once the moving truck pulls away the pressure of a deadline will be off and I can return to writing, reading and being a friend.

Tom & Alexa

I had a brief escape to Chicago last weekend for the much anticipated wedding of my son's best friend whom I fondly refer to as Foster Boy (aka Tom-Ass, Foster Son or Tall Boy). He's smart, industrious and full of fun. Sometimes too much fun, to the point of obnoxiousness. He helped me set up my new cell phone years ago. Then he moved to Japan but since he had conveniently set up my password he also had access. It wasn't unusual for my phone greeting to be changed to the most outrageous message according to Tom's whim.But that is the classic Tom we all know and love.

He and his bride, Alexa met while students at University of Michigan. While Tom was working in Japan my son was Alexa's Foster Boyfriend, taking her to her sorority events and pulling the dreaded duty of accompanying her to many a Blackhawks hockey game. I've seen her practically make grown men cry when she's in action as the world's most rabid hockey fan.

Beautiful Walloon Lake

My son and the groom have been best buds since their teen years, living out an idyllic summer existence on Walloon Lake in Northern Michigan. The band of boys (and later sisters and girlfriends) boated around the lake most of the summer in a pack, they took their water sports seriously.Always in search of the glassy flat surface in which they could do some extreme water skiing.

Tom, being the youngest in his family had a natural affinity for babies and we had them in big supply for a few years. The small rustic guest cottage in the back of our property was naturally  a big attraction for all the teens on the lake. In exchange for chores and babysitting I hosted dinner for the roving pack of 6-8 boys every Thursday. Many of the boys family's joined the program and these guys ate together like kings several nights a week.

Although they are spread out geographically, a few of the original pack members were at the wedding:

Scott with his lovely fiance Kristy

My son Michael with Peyton

 Unfortunately adult hood leaves them unable to spend summers on the lake.These guys worked hard, played hard and left a legend behind on the lake that I don't think has been equaled as of yet. Last summer on a brief visit to Northern Michigan I met a woman who told me a tale of a bunch of fanatic waterskiing boys who frequented her cove to take advantage of the smooth as glass water in the evening. She could not believe her eyes when they zipped by her property NAKED waterskiing.

I did not lay claim to them being any relation to me. I just asked, "by any chance was it a white and red Mastercraft ski boat?" When she confirmed that it was I just responded, "oh yeah, that was a wild bunch". Now that brides and future babies are on the horizon I hope they have all developed some sense of caution and survival.

The Prince (pictured here with his big sis) has become a semi-professional wedding attendant. "Always a bridesmaid, never a bride" has been the theme for several years. After his best man gig for Foster Boy he has another wedding this summer. When a great deal came along, he decided to bite the bullet and just buy a tux.

2 separate bachelor party events were part of the obligations this spring, one in Miami and one in Las Vegas. I noticed there were pictures immediately posted on Face book from the Miami deep sea fishing expedition, but I have yet to hear a peep about the last one (not surprising due to the what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas thing) but I swear the boy has not been quite right since his return.

After observing the hijinx of several of the Northwestern University grad students at the wedding, I'm pretty sure I don't want to know what happened in Vegas.

The Beaumont Texas Gang

I did find out our clan had some stiff competition for the "we actually enjoy hanging together " family award. The above brother-sister trio may look quite respectable and inconspicuous but don't let that fool you. They were absolute dancing fools.  Their mother was a brilliant ring leader who gave me a serious run for my money.Much to my surprise this was what  we all went crazy dancing to for the last song of the night. Who would have thought hidden in these hard driving men were Gleeks? My children do their best to make me look good on the dance floor but I think I have been outdone by that Texas gang.

Dancing with the Pastry (or Party) Princess

  Home again this week it's a full court press to finish packing for the big move to Austin. I'm truthfully ready to be done with the whole moving thing and there is still so much to do. I'm looking forward to being able to post all the stories that I have only had time to write in my mind. There, residing in my noggin are some brilliant observations about what's happening in the world outside my door.

The Mayor & the best man

Meet my contributing author

Well, to be fair that is a vintage picture (taken 10 years ago) of my number 6 child. If she could have typed at age 3 1/2 she would have been hilarious because she always made up the funniest sayings. For one of her classes last year she developed this little diddy about her teenaged sister:

SNAPSHOT OF MY SISTER

by Dylan Marie

Slumped over the table her finger joints moving as fast as a cheetah running, it looked as if she had been there for days with a smelly grey sweatshirt and a pair of black sweat pants on. A blank face stared at the computer screen and everything else was dark in the room. She looked as pale as snow. The computer screen reflected off her face with her mouth clamped shut and her eyes looked as if they were going to pop out. She yelled, “GET OUT!”

The author, Raymondo & The Hurricane

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Ain't sisterly love grand? This snapshot of her subject is so right on the mark that I just had to frame it and hang it up in the kitchen. Anyway, the sister who was the focus of this essay, The Hurricane, graduated from high school last week. The weekend of her ceremony was darkened by some of the worst storms in recent Detroit Metro history. Documentation of the event was pretty lame as I was recovering from a serious bout of stomach flu. I cut myself out of the few pictures I was in because I still looked pasty pale and sickly.

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RANDOM TRAIN

Why is it that the job of a mother to worry is never done? My fully capable #5 child, The Fashionista, announced she was walking with her friend to a nearby dairy for ice cream. It's a bit of a hike, but they cut through the neighboring subdivision and across some train tracks for a more direct route. We've made the trek together many times.

There is just something that gives me the willies to walk across the tracks. I've certainly made it clear that train tracks, no matter how infrequent the train, are something to be respected and there is to be no foolishness on them at any time.

Sure enough 20 minutes after they left I hear the train horn tooting. A momentary panic fills my chest, so I call on the cell phone. A very exasperated daughter answers....she assured me they were already at their destination licking on an ice cream cone. Since the train already came by they were sure not to encounter one on the way back.

Phew. We dodged that one and they were on the way back so I could just settle myself down. It's hard to believe I used to have nerves of steel. Next year she'll have her driver's permit and that will open up a whole new can of worms to be concerned about.

After last Friday’s events I’m going to send myself for some remedial disaster preparedness classes, because I’m certain my bathtub is not the best place to ride out a possible tornado.

 A nice long bubble bath seemed like a good way to rejuvenate myself after suffering from a 24 hour stomach virus. I’m of the opinion that a long hot bath is the cure to many of life’s ills. I was so anxious to finish reading the latest Charlaine Harris novel, Dead In The Family, that I had to refresh the hot water twice so I could finish up the book. You know how it is. Sometimes you get into your book and time just flies.

This was one of those times. I was totally oblivious to the storm brewing outside. I barely let the parade of daughters coming into my sanctuary to borrow this or that bother me. I didn’t even scream, “GET OUT” as I have sometimes have been known to do.

I was definitely in my happy place after a day of being in the unhappy nauseated place. My bath tub is framed by a 6 x 4 foot window up in the second story. Outside the tall evergreens whose tops cover my window were dancing at a more frantic pace as the wind picked up. I remember thinking about  how when we lived on Lake Michigan we used to have a great view of the storms rolling in over the water.

Bay Harbor, Lake Michigan

Maybe my years living through the ferocious winds and harsh weather on the lake desensitized me to perilous conditions. During one particularly nasty Northern Michigan storm my daughters window blew off the side of our house and flew across my neighbors yard.

Lake Michigan facing west

When the trees began absolutely beating on my window followed by marble sized hail being slung against the glass I began to take notice. I wondered if there had been any tornado watches issued. It’s hard to even know when to take TV  storm warnings seriously. It seems like the media likes to hype up every sideways fart that blows our way into a weather crisis.

Then the lights began flickering and took their sweet time deciding if they would stay on or turn off completely. Since the darkness was interfering with my reading I reluctantly began my careful exit. That’s when the howling got really loud and the lights decided- OFF.

the bigger they are...the harder they fall

Holy crap! I don’t want to be in the middle of a twister naked. In the dark, trying to quickly dry off, find sweats and pull them over still wet skin proved harder than it should have been. It was like one of those dreams you have when you keep misdialing the police when someone is trying to shoot you. Out my bedroom window I think I saw Toto fly by.

Devistation in Dundee, MI

 
As I hurried down  the stairs I realized I hadn’t heard a peep from the 3 other occupants of my house who were also home. I’m calling them occupants instead of beloved family members because a family member would have checked on their beloved mother and wife. No, instead they were following the odd unspoken policy of ignoring me on the  rare occasions I’m sick.

“Helloo, where is everyone”? Well the man of the house was snuggled on the couch, in a jet lagged oblivion of his own. The other 2 were in a Sims 3 Ambitions induced trance that even the short lived power losses failed to crack. Their biggest worry during the dark howling storm was getting their new game operational again. (I wasn’t kidding when I said Lake Michigan storms had desensitized us).

Large trees down everywhere

All humor and sarcasm aside, there was nothing funny about the tornados that swept through Michigan and Ohio last weekend. 7 people lost their lives in Lake County Ohio and the Michigan town where my annual whiffle ball tournament took place  the previous week took a direct hit.

And, I vow in the name of emergency preparedness I will not spend the next tornado in a bubble bath in front of 24 square feet of glass.