Pirelli Snow Tires

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Why do men like the things men like? I just don’t think it’s very practical to have to buy another set of tires for the winter season. Especially when you’re already making an obscene lease payment on said car. I mean it was a Audi A8 and I appreciated the fact that it handled really well in the snow since we live in Michigan. At that time we lived in Northern Michigan, way up at the tip of the ring finger (you know when you hold up your hand to represent the state and point to your town’s location.) In addition due to our Lake Michigan location we got lake effect snow most days all winter. At least it seemed like everyday. The season begins in mid October and lasts until May and It seems like eternity when you’re trying to survive the winter up there.

I have to admit it was a pretty bad ass car and it garnered some attention in parking lots around the state. Once I was innocently trying to go into Petco to pick up some dog food when a gentleman stopped me and peppered me with questions in regards to my ride. Turns out he was a veteran auto exec and he just really got excited about the fact I was nonchalantly doing errands in that year’s model that had won Car of The Year. Only in the Detroit area do these things happen. It was kind of like driving a celebrity, but at the time I had 6 kids at home (the last 2 only 15 months apart) and I was just trying to enjoy a child free afternoon.

Now I like cars. I am pure bred southern NASCAR fan. But did you ever notice the more high tech gadgetry your stuff has the more likely it is to malfunction? After my shopping expedition I returned home. I pulled the superstar car into the driveway, unloaded the car and was quickly engulfed with every crisis that had occurred during my absence. It was utter chaos while my husband was locked in the bedroom on the conference call of the century. A few short hours later everyone was sleeping peacefully as I listened to the rain pour down outside. While taking the dog out early the next morning I saw that I had unfortunately left the driver’s side window down. Uh oh. I kicked into high gear and beach toweled that car like crazy thinking,“he’ll never know.”

Later that day, my road warrior husband was packed up ready to head downstate and on to the airport. He was also taking my daughter’s best friend home to Detroit on the way. We all waved good bye and kicked back for some well deserved rest. It is a uniquely summer “up north” ritual that we were observing, the Sunday return of the workforce to reality. I had not even finished my lemonade when my husband called to say something bizarre was happening with his car and he was literally pulling into the Audi dealership for the emergency. Having to leave his baby there for service, we got him another vehicle and off he went. I don’t know why men get so worked up over stuff like this, these things happen, just move on to plan B.

According to my daughter’s friend who was lucky enough to witness this event firsthand, while they were cruising along on the way out of town the car seat electronics started going crazy, repeatedly moving the seat back and forth, literally smooching my husband into the steering wheel! A moment later it reclined itself all the way back and refused to be budged. It was in this state when he pulled into the dealership. The only thing I had to say about it was “how weird!”. I used that well practiced dumb blond routine to convince everyone that I could not imagine why that would have happened. But I was laughing so hard my teenagers quickly surmised I knew more than I was telling.

Who would have known this prince of precision German engineering could not take a little water without pitching a fit? Did my 1976 AMC Gremlin ever complain when I accidentally left the windows down? No it did not, it just kept motoring along with it’s 21 gallon gas tank, vinyl seats, no radio and no air conditioning. The Gremlin (brand new for $2000) cost me the equivalent of 2 monthly car payments for that sniveling puss of an Audi. Who cares if the GPS Genie could give you audible directions in 5 different languages if it cannot function under some minor water damage. Damage is an exaggeration, the electronic circuits were fine once they dried out.

I finally confessed to my teenage son, the only other male member of our entourage, what had happened. At 19 he was the “go to” guy for our household since the elder male was preoccupied with traveling and work. Ever since he got his license he assumed all responsibilities for auto maintenance, purchasing, the whole shebang. He called our trusty Audi mechanic and once he swore him to secrecy he relayed the whole sordid story of the driver’s cockpit getting very wet. Andy said that saved him a whole days worth of labor diagnosing what had happened. 

Well, the Audi A 8 is no longer a member of our motor vehicle harem. It went back to the dealer when the lease was up. Now all we have as a memento is this set of premium Pirelli Winter tires with custom rims that were taking up space in our storage locker. Observe the luster and tread on these babies. If you happen to have an Audi A 8 send me a note because these pups are going on E-bay this week.

Sunday is NASCAR day

Father’s Day 2008 was a monumental day for all of us diehard Earnhardt fans. Good old Junior won the race at the Michigan International Speedway. After the controversy of leaving his father’s team that is now controlled by his step mama, this was one very sweet win. The worse part is I had stepped out of the room and when I came back in Dale Jr. was crossing the finish line in first place. Imagine my surprise today when I switched on the tv to watch the race at the Pocono race track in Pennsylvania, to find Earnhardt talking about his new sponsor “Go Daddy.com”. I had to mention that in case you all think the only companies interested in NASCAR were Miller Brewing, Home Depot and Viagra.

I have come to really enjoy following the Nascar sport. I only became interested when I realized it was a good topic I could use with my dad. It gives us something to talk about over the phone while he’s in North Carolina. We even join into a big betting pool to  make the race even more personal for us. There, above his entertainment center hangs an authentic framed picture of Dale Earnhardt Sr., signed to my dad. A very kind friend of mine who was a GM executive was so taken with my dad after meeting him  surprised us after the next race, bringing the large picture for Virgil. The picture quickly became more valuable as Dale Sr. died shortly after that at the Daytona 500 (February 2001)race.

Oddly enough I have come to enjoy the traditions associated with the sport and learning about the personalities and families of the drivers. I also love how they gather their family around them before they hop in their car to start the race. A prayer is spoken, the national anthem sung.... and then it’s “GENTLEMEN, START YOUR ENGINES!”